As “trauma” becomes a more commonly used word, many people may not be clear on what trauma actually is. According to the Child Welfare Information Gateway, “trauma is an emotional response to an event that threatens or causes harm.” If this sounds like it could include a lot of things, you’re right: there are many types of trauma.
As “trauma” becomes a more commonly used word, many people may not be clear on what trauma actually is. According to the Child Welfare Information Gateway, “trauma is an emotional response to an event that threatens or causes harm.” If this sounds like it could include a lot of things, you’re right: there are many types of trauma.
These range from different types of abuse to accidents or even natural disasters. Further examples of potential traumatic events include:
There are also different effects that traumatic events can have on children. These effects can be seen in four main areas:
In order to address the traumas that children experience, a trauma-informed care approach is essential. In the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) report on trauma-informed care, professionals can find helpful tools for training and education.
But trauma-informed care isn’t just for professionals. Foster parents also need access to the tools and benefits of how trauma-informed care help the children they care for. An easy place to start is known as the “4 Rs:”
As a foster parent, it’s important to keep learning and educating yourself on how to best help the children coming into your care. The “4 Rs” will help give you a framework for identifying the programs and organizations that can help prepare you in trauma-informed care approaches.
Much can be done in the first few days with your new foster child. By providing simple sensory comforts that are familiar to the child, you can help them settle in and avoid re-traumatization.
Asking questions is a great place to start! Don’t be afraid to ask children about their favorite foods, their bedtime routines, hobbies, and favorite things to do. This will help you identify more specific needs and help build trust if you follow through.
Actively showing them around the house when they arrive will also help ease some environmental discomfort. Show them their room and what’s theirs, and as well as other areas of the house they can access freely. Show them the things they have access to that meet their daily needs such as snacks, ways to get a hold of you, and house guidelines. This will also help keep you accountable and assist you in responding rather than punishing.
All these actions demonstrate stability and security—one of the number one things foster children need.
While it’s definitely okay to ask questions, make sure that your motivation is to empathize, connect, and try to understand the child’s perspective. Pay attention and recognize where the child might have trauma-induced triggers. But don’t probe or push an issue if you’re met with resistance. Be open to listening if they want to talk, but don’t make it an interrogation.
In short, it’s key to cultivate a positive environment in your home. You can do this by:
Remember: the essential component of a positive environment is you as the foster parent. Children pick up on your attitudes, moods, and side conversations. This doesn’t mean you have to be perfect—just be aware that you’re making an impact.
While it can be difficult to not speak badly about a children’s biological parents, try your best to honor the relationships between children and their parents. You can do this by acknowledging their love for their parents and their parents’ love for them.
In your own mind, know that despite any abuse or neglect, the child in your care is experiencing grief and loss. Being simply separated from one’s parents and sometimes siblings can be a traumatic event in and of itself. Therefore, make sure to support contact with the children’s biological family as recommended by the program you’re working with. Before you do anything, have clarity on the policies and case specifics around family contact.
As far as your interaction with the child’s parents, it’s useful to provide information on how the child is doing. You can include what their routines are like and about your home environment. You can also ask the parents about routines the child had before, what soothes them, and what they like and dislike. More practical questions include if they have any medical conditions, allergies, etc.
While these activities may not be the most comfortable for you, the children you’re caring for will benefit from and feel reassured when they see the adults in their life collaborating. It makes a difference to have them see you work together to resolve issues and do your best to make the situation smoother.
All in all, trauma-informed care means continually educating yourself about how you can best approach trauma as a foster parent. The more you know about trauma and its effects on children, the more you can advocate for the child and avoid repeating their traumas.
Moreover, any additional training you receive will boost your feelings of competency as a foster parent and can help relieve stress for both you and the child. For more resources on foster care, get in touch with a VQ Team Member today.
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